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FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-02-10 22:10

Nathan Corwin, B.A., H.R.E.O.

It was a normal day on Wall Street. Well, it was normal in the sense that nothing extraordinary had happened so far. But then again, it was early in the day and there was plenty of time for anything to happen.
Even on the 39th floor of a non-descript building on Park Avenue, things were relatively normal.
From his position behind an oversized desk, Nathan Corwin had a spectacular view of the city below him. Well, he would have, should he ever choose to turn around. His desk was situated in the northern corner of the building and he would have been able to survey the entire floor from there, had he not erected a wall of flat screen panels to shield himself from the general cacophony beyond. Sixteen screens, arranged in a double row denied everyone access to his little kingdom in the corner. The only way for people from the other side to see what was going on beyond that wall was to walk around one of the corners, something only a few did and even fewer did voluntarily.
He had considered building a moat in front of the wall, but after digging for about a foot, he had broken through the ceiling of the floor below and decided that crocodiles would not be able to live in a trench ten inches deep anyway.
He had covered the hole with a board and a bit of leftover carpet. After all, it might prove useful yet, as either a trap or a quick exit route, should he need one.

At the moment, Nathan Corwin was engrossed in a phone conversation with someone 20 floors beneath him that was suggesting that a particular volatility position was perhaps a tiny bit oversized. He tried to explain to the propellerhead on the other end that he was looking at the entire structure wrong, but all he got was a stream of ‘but’s, ‘how about?’s and ‘Hold on’s. Between shouting down the line and breaking a pencil, he was chewing on the phone cord.
Phone cords were great. You could play with them, wrap them around people, chew on them and he was pretty sure that by tying several of them together in a thick rope one could get an excellent bungee cord. He had yet to try that out with someone.
Handsets were great too. They were black, big and most importantly: they were hard, which made them an excellent tool for beating a variety of things, such as nails into walls or junior traders to the ground.
In combination with a telephone cord, handsets made for a lethal and intimidating weapon. He had once tied three of them together in imitation of a bola and effectively roped a running back office clerk with it.

Chewing on a phone cord he always found solutions. It was helping already. His mind began to form images of a certain risk manager flying of the roof with a makeshift bungee cord.
Just as he was about to suggest to the other end that he should come up to the roof to look at some files he had prepared for him, the connection went dead. Raising an eyebrow, first at the phone, then at the phone cord, Nathan discovered that he had chewed straight through the cord. Again.
With a sigh, he picked up another one of his phones and called technical support.
“Yes, hello, this is Nathan Corwin. A rat chewed through my phone cord again. Can you send someone up with a new one? Thank you.”
He put the phone down and picked up an empty paper cup. Whistling a merry tune, he began to shred the bottom of the cup into tiny pieces, which he carefully placed on the floor beneath his desk. He put the maimed cup next to the shreds and made some final adjustments to the various pieces. Satisfied that everything looked right, he leaned back and waited for the support gnome to arrive.
Five minutes later, a tiny person peeked timidly around the wall of screens. A voice, at least two octaves too high to properly belong to a man, squeaked:
”Mr. Corwin, I have your phone cord here. You said your last one was chewed on, by… ah.. a rat?”
“That’s right, look here kid.”, he dangled the maimed cord in front of the gnome “damn thing bit right through the copper wires.”
Confused, the support employee unplugged the cord from the dealer board and the handset and then replaced it with the new one he had brought.
Satisfied that the new cord worked properly, he inspected the bite marks on the old one.
“Uh… are you sure this was a rat, Mr. Corwin?” he ventured.
“Of course I’m sure. Fucking pests are everywhere, I’m telling you.” As if on cue he pushed himself away from the desk. Pausing for effect, he looked at the floor under his desk.
“Ah crap. Look at that! Damn thing got into my coffee!” He pointed at the shredded paper cup.
“Seriously, they have to do something about these rats…. They’re everywhere. Next thing you know, their inside the computers, building their nests!” he mumbled as he got out of his chair and collected the different pieces from the floor and threw them into the paper bin.
Frightened, the young employee looked around, expecting a rat to appear at any moment. He slowly retreated in direction of the far wall, apparently careful not to step on anything rodent-like.
“Well… thanks for the cord.” said Nathan as he sat back down again.
The support gnome only nodded apprehensively and quickly disappeared behind the wall of screens.
Stretching his arms, Nathan pulled himself back to his desk. He would have to buy a pet rat someday and set it loose in here to add credibility to his tales. He could then try to convince the owners of this oversized money-lending operation that a cat on the desk might be a useful addition. Of course he had his own cat in mind whose company he preferred to that of the current assistant he had.
In truth the kid wasn’t so bad. Apart from the horrible taste in fashion and the fact that he caved in quite easily when being yelled at, he had a certain substance that Nathan believed he could mold to suit his purpose.


The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

RFMontraz
NP Italian Stallion

Total Posts: 1991
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-02-16 14:08

Ready for the second chapter dude.. Worship


Fund Raising and Racketeering, Capital Structure Demolition LLC - What the fuck you mean "not interested" you motherfucker you??

FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-02-16 17:46
The phone rang. With a glance at his dealer board’s screen he saw the label ‘Moron’ flashing. With a sigh he took the handset and tapped the touch screen to connect the call.
“Weapons bay.” he answered in the staccato-like manner of speech characteristic of military communication.
“Nathan…. Is that you?” inquired a voice on the other end, clearly somewhat confused.
“No. This is the submarine U.S.S. Alabama.” was his reply, again making an imitation of an officer. He expected some sort of reaction, but after only getting a silent breathing on the other end, he once again found himself reaffirmed that the initiator of the call indeed did do the label ‘Moron’ full justice.
With a “Yes it’s me. What do you want?” he let his gullible counterpart of the hook.
And again several seconds of silence passed before, finally, the caller so aptly labeled, spoke up: “Ahahaha, I thought it was you. But, you know, I’ve got so many lines here... sometimes I press the wrong buttons…”
Nathan rolled his eyes toward the ceiling as a sign of inward capitulation. Trying to comfort the other being, who clearly must be in pain from so much stupidity, he said: “Well, it’s good then that you work as a broker, isn’t it. Doesn’t require operating heavy machinery that is controlled with tiny buttons.”
Silence… followed by snorting laughter: “Hrrrahahaha. Yeah, that’s me. Wouldn’t want me using a powerdrill. Hahaha. No sir, not me. Hrrrrahaha.”
“Well, now that we have found the perfect vocation for you, perhaps you can tell me what you have for me.” interrupted Nathan.
He didn’t really expect this talking rock to have anything that was either of value or not a fabrication, let alone still unknown to any of a hundred other brokers.
But hope always dies last, he told himself as he absent-mindedly listened to a torrent of prices that were all pretty much untradable.
After he was done, the other person inquired: “Are you interested in trading any of these?”
“No.” said Nathan flatly, then disconnected the call.
Making a mental note to inform the Natural History Museum that he had just discovered the missing link between ape and man, Nathan Corwin looked at his watch. 15 minutes remained to the opening. And where was the runt kid? Not here. Annoyed at this renewed lapse in punctuality, Nathan flipped a page on his dealerboard and tapped the screen to call his assistant. As he began to hear the ringtone, he also heard a cellular phone ringing on the other side of the wall of screens. Muttering something about being lucky, he hung up.
Seconds later, his assistant peeked around the corner and asked “Good morning sir. Can I get you some coffee?”
“Yes you can. Fucking rats got into my last one.” was the grumpy reply.
If this rather unusual answer perplexed the young man, he hid it well, for no sign of irritation showed on his face. After a minute or so, he reappeared from behind the screens, carrying two cups of coffee.
“Thank you.” said Nathan as he accepted the cup, in a rare lapse of appreciation towards his junior. Setting the cup on the desk, Nathan opened the drawer and pulled out a blister of caffeine pills. He popped out two of them and dropped them into the steaming beverage. While he waited for them to dissolve he brought up the results of some analysis on one of the screens. Pointing at the list, he instructed his assistant in what instruments he was going to be trading. Or rather, he pointed out which one he wasn’t going to be trading.
“Leave these 2 out of the list. We’ll get them cheaper.” he instructed.
With a curt nod, the kid pulled up his own chair and began punching one of the keyboards.

The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

RFMontraz
NP Italian Stallion

Total Posts: 1991
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-02-16 18:25

Big Smile Dude that's really good!

PS I feel sorry for that hard working broker (but eventually he's gonna be the hero, right?)


Fund Raising and Racketeering, Capital Structure Demolition LLC - What the fuck you mean "not interested" you motherfucker you??

RFMontraz
NP Italian Stallion

Total Posts: 1991
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-10 17:32
Am I the only one who likes this? Well so be it.  C'mon dude gimme some mo'....

Fund Raising and Racketeering, Capital Structure Demolition LLC - What the fuck you mean "not interested" you motherfucker you??

Nonius
Founding Member
Nonius Unbound
Total Posts: 11694
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-10 17:35
I like it too....comeon cat, get wit da catnip and write.

Location: somewhere in CfA2 Great Wall.

Martingale
NP House Mouse

Total Posts: 2590
Joined: Jun 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-10 18:33
I love it, please continue

YukaRedux
Now with added evil

Total Posts: 650
Joined: Dec 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-11 01:40

I'm gonna need another shot of NC soon...


we'd be fools not to ride this strange torpedo all the way to the end!

FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-11 08:15
As equity and options markets across the country opened, Nathan Corwin watched a multitude of numbers scroll past his screens. Some of them flickered too rapidly for the human eye to follow. To his left his assistant was calmly clicking some colorful windows and pressing a few buttons here and there.
While the kid traded entire lists of stocks and options, Nathan focused on two issues only at the moment. While most of his strategies were automated, his favorite pastime consisted of creating what he called the ‘Information Advantage™’.
On this particular day, he had created a rather severe disadvantage for someone as he had unexpectedly exercised puts on two companies overnight and was now forcing the stocks lower. As he had kept an eye on the overnight activity, he was certain that whoever had been assigned the stock had either not noticed or didn’t care…. yet.
Sipping his caffeine-enriched coffee, he quickly paused to muse on the true nature of trading. This was trading in it’s purest form. Forcing someone to trade purely on your terms, with no room for negotiation, that was the ultimate art: The sharks in the water.
The bread and butter of daily turnover and position taking was all very nice, but when it came to considering the ‘Jutsu’ of commerce, as his old mentor was known to say, nothing could quite compare to the begging of your counterparty as they tried to pull their testicles from the death grip of the commercial vise.
He had waited for a day where the two stocks were at a breaking point and his forecasts for the general market and the sector were pointing lower to play his card. Like a group of high school bullies ganging up on the local nerd, Nathan Corwin too felt that there was a certain safety in numbers.

A voice from the left intruded on his reverie: “Sir, we got a short 69.”
Nathan snapped from his musings. A ‘short 69’ didn’t mean that his assistant had gotten lucky while browsing images on a midget porn site. Rather, it entailed that the analytics had screened a short stock trade with an indicated probability that the trade would be a winner of 69% over the next three days.
69 was a very good number and could easily turn into a 187 for someone else. If he could get 69s all day long his job would be alot easier.
“I think it’s time to get out the axe.” announced Nathan.
“Yes sir.” complied his assistant and began configuring a dialog box on his screen.
The ‘axe’ was actually an algorithm that allowed the trading of deltas across multiple markets with one fell swoop. Through the innocent click of a button the computer engaged in smacking every single stock bid, call bid and put offer it could lay it’s greedy virtual paws on.
It was expensive to do so, but Nathan felt justified in paying the price. To his mind, there was a time for thinking pennies and a time for thinking dollars.
He pulled up the stock in question on another screen in addition to the two he was already harrying. This day had the feel of a grinder to it, where things would just continually grind lower without looking back and Nathan Corwin was not going to be left behind.

The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

Martingale
NP House Mouse

Total Posts: 2590
Joined: Jun 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-11 13:51

Applause After you finish, FDAX, I will compile this into an article to seduce chicks....Big Smile


dadeto
NP Priestess

Total Posts: 562
Joined: Sep 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-16 23:54
FDAX, your writting parsimony is very frustrating. Angry

"Stay rude. Stay rebel." FDAXHunter

FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-17 08:46
Sorry, stuff is moving too much at the moment for me to sneak away a quiet moment. Maybe on the weekend.

The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

pj


Total Posts: 2918
Joined: Jun 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-17 10:14
We are waiting patiently, but with impatience...

Martingale, after this story will finish we will be probably too old for chicks
(even with the money we will be earning at that time)

Нас ебут, а мы крепнем...

jungle
Chief Rhythm Officer
CSD LLC
Total Posts: 3162
Joined: Jul 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-17 10:44
maybe you should do what damien hirst does, have a team of 30 assistants to "help" produce your art for you...

never get out the goddam boat

Johnny
Founding Member

Total Posts: 4331
Joined: May 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-17 11:20
You say that as though it's a bad thing ...

Stab Art Radiation Capital Structure Demolition LLC

Patrik
Founding Member

Total Posts: 1205
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-18 11:11
Just got into the story - love it so far.

Paper trading, Capital Structure Demolition LLC Radiation

Vincent


Total Posts: 192
Joined: Mar 2005
 
Posted: 2005-03-29 18:16

think I'm gonna stop reading Hull and Chance. I'll probably learn more from Mr Corwin.

 


FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-30 11:06
Things indeed did slowly grind lower as the morning wore on. No fire sale, but enough to have around 25 billion dollars in market capitalization dissolve back into the filthy New York City air that it was made of. Of course nothing had changed in the economy nor in any individual company since yesterday, but if the chickens felt like flapping around, one might as well seize the moment and snatch up the eggs, reasoned Nathan.
The phone rang. Again the line labeled ‘Moron’ flashed red, indicating potential danger… or pain.
With a long sigh, he picked up the call and rasped: “Yen swaps.”
A confused babble erupted on the other end, ending in something like “Sorry mate, wrong number.” and hung up.
Disgusted, he reflected how degenerate a man had to be to try to adopt a British dialect when one was obviously born in Brooklyn. He also wondered just how someone could come up with the concept of dialing a wrong number on a direct line.
Again the phone rang. Again the impersonation of a Yen swaps trader was the answer. Again the other side hung up.
Shrugging, Nathan returned his attention to the many tables and charts hovering in front of him. Nothing was indicating a reversal of today’s action. Nevertheless no big sellers beside himself had appeared in the two names he was trying to squeeze lower. “Well, so far, so good” he mused quietly.

“Sir,” began an inquiry from his junior “Some of these deltas here are getting pretty big. And some of the indications are pointing upwards, so it might be a good time to hedge. Should I start buying some of these?”
Nathan looked briefly at the risk monitor and shook his head in the negative: “No, leave them on. I wouldn’t be surprised if we’re off by a percent at the close. Maybe more.”
Apparently unconvinced, the assistant pointed at one of the screens and asked again: “Even the two here where the system points upwards with reasonable confidence?”
Nodding, Nathan began to elaborate: “Yes, leave them alone. There is a time for thinking pennies… “
“… and a time for thinking dollars. Yes, I know.” finished the junior trader.
“You know, if you’re getting tired of that phrase, I can use something else. Like: ‘Make hay when the sun shines’ or ‘kick ‘em when their down’… or maybe ‘If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.’”
Scratching his chin he added: “Or how about: ‘You can’t make an omelet without breaking a few balls… I mean eggs’.
Then again… perhaps something more antique, like ‘Quid quid latine dictum sit, altum videtur.’”
“What does that mean?” asked the kid.
“’Anything said in Latin sounds profound.’”
He pondered again for a moment, then said: “Or maybe something more profound from the Far East… like 'Confucius say: Man with big penis must use it now and then or lose it.'”
At this the junior trader gave a look of genuine puzzlement: “Confucius said that?”
“Um… yeah. He did… I think… he probably said that. Yes.”
Waving his hand in dismissal, Nathan returned the conversation to the matter at hand: “Anyway, we can’t have all this short index gamma be eating away our delta, now can we?”
Having said that he, grabbed his mouse and took out another bid in the S&P 500 futures, printing a new low for the day.

The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

Mela
NP High Priestess

Total Posts: 708
Joined: May 2004
 
Posted: 2005-03-30 11:24

Confucius say: Man with big penis must use it now and then or lose it.

LOL! Applause


Johnny
Founding Member

Total Posts: 4331
Joined: May 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-06 11:42

Probably time for the next instalment, isn't it? Big Smile

 


Johnny Jupiter Radiation Phynancial phorecasting by the stars for the stars

YukaRedux
Now with added evil

Total Posts: 650
Joined: Dec 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-06 12:15

funny, i was just thinking the same thing..


your counternance belies your wisdom. you look quite intelligent.

Martingale
NP House Mouse

Total Posts: 2590
Joined: Jun 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-06 13:28
Yeah, FDAX writes too slow while nonius writes too fast...

FDAXHunter
Founding Member

Total Posts: 8231
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-07 12:52

While he was clicking here and pushing buttons there Nathan found himself interrupted in his favorite activity by an attention demanding, no nonsense brooking “Ahem” uttered by a figure clad in a dark blue suit standing on his right.
The man that seemed to have materialized out of nowhere was Stanley Longfield, proud bearer of the grand title of ‘Director of Global Equity Trading’.
He hadn’t heard him coming, which meant he should really be thinking about that moat again. Or perhaps a simple tripwire with a bell would suffice. But before he could carry the thought of making his desk more of an impregnable fortress any further, Stanley Longfield began to speak:
“Good Morning Nathan.”
“Morning Stan. What brings you to my humble corner?” chimed Nathan, knowing full well what had caused his superior to put in an appearance.
“Oh cut the crap, will you? How big is your delta?”
“Not that big really. Just another one of those days, you know.” was his tactical response.
At this, Stanley Longfield slightly raised his voice: “Not that big? I tell you how big it is. It won’t show up in my risk sheet! Excel shows me a bunch of ####’s because it won’t fit into the god-damned cell!” He waved a sheet of paper that he was carrying for emphasis. “That’s how fucking big it is!”

Nathan looked toward the ceiling as if involved in genuine contemplation.
“Hum. Okay, I can see how that would be a problem. Can’t you just make the cell bigger? Like so….” He called up an Excel sheet on the screen closest to Stanley and began resizing columns.
“The cells size is fine the way it is! It’s your position size that’s too big!”
Sighing in obvious exasperation, the director took a moment to calm himself, then proceeded in a more steady manner.
“Look. It’s not like I’m trying to give you a hard time for nothing. It’s just now that the swaptions desk dropped those 300 million, we are looking pretty good all of a sudden compared to the Fixed Income guys. I don’t want to give that away in the last two months of the year, you know?”
“Well, you’ll have to forgive me for trying to maximize my total contribution to the firm at large rather than maintaining a relative P/L over a swaps desk.” Having said that, he pointed at another screen. “In the meantime, all I can do is offer you today’s 7 digit number as a contribution to the Stanley Longfield Corporate Elevation Fund.”
The director bent closer and squinted at the number. Nathan thought he saw a small glitter in his eyes. It was such a cliché but the old ‘Fear & Greed’ principle always worked.

“Well, that’s a nice number.” conceded Stanley who was visibly more relaxed now. “But you know, I’m just really nervous. If this year ends in the way things are shaping up at the moment, I could have a real shot at heading up Capital Markets. I’m not prepared to gamble with that opportunity.”
Nathan wanted to say something playful to lighten up his mood.
“Would you feel more comfortable if I sold some bonds against it?” he offered.
“You want to sell Treasuries against this?”
“Well, I was more thinking to sell some corporates.. get it done Texan style, you know?” He stuck his tongue out at Stanley.
“Oh stop it.” chuckled Stanley and took a playful swipe at Nathan’s shoulder. “Really, this isn’t the time for silly games. If I get promoted, you’ll be upgraded as well. Count on it.”
“Oh jolly good!” exclaimed Nathan. “Like to what?”
“I’ll create a new position for you. Something reporting directly to me.”
“Great. Can I invent my own title?” he asked.
“Oh not this again! Enough of that monkey business. I went out of my way already to let you print those two ridiculous acronyms on your business card. Nathan Corwin, B.A., H.R.E.O. Please! No more of that!”
“Well, excuse me.” began Nathan “but I do believe that ‘Bastard Arbitrageur’ is an officially sanctioned BMA certification. What's wrong with that?”
“Oh please. And ‘Highway Robber Extra-Ordinaire’? We can count ourselves lucky that nobody ever actually asked what it means. No! No more of that.”
Nathan shrugged. “Well, technically I think that’s more of a NASD term...”
“Will you ever grow up?” Then he bent past Nathan so he could see the assistant and posed the same question to him: “Do you think he’ll ever grow up?”
Nathan patted his junior trader on the shoulder and replied with a broad smile: “Oh, I will… eventually I mean. But don’t you worry…. I’ve been training kiddo here in the meantime to take my place when that happens.”
“God help us all!” came the reply from Stanley, his face a mask of mock horror.

Stanley wasn’t a bad guy, especially as far as heads of departments went. He was reasonably clued about the market and had, at one time, made quite a bit of money for the bank. He wasn’t without a sense of humor, but he played the corporate game like few others could. Given the choice between playtime and politics, he would always choose the latter. That aside, he gave Nathan enough space to breathe and protected him as best as he could.

Nathan picked up again on the possible promotion: “So new job, reporting to you. I can do that, but you’ll have to give me a title of my choosing.”
Curiosity got the better of Stanley Longfield in the end: “Allright, what would you like it to be?”
Nathan tried to look as nonchalant as he could and said: “How about ‘Grand Overseer of Algorithmic Trading’? That’s reasonably technical, no?”
Stanley Longfield knew better than to reply and simply murmured the words again in repetition, noting the first letters of each word. Nathan could tell when he was done by the startled look that showed on his face.
“No! You can’t have a title that abbreviates to G.O.A.T.! Are you nuts?! You’ll be a level below me. You’ll show up on the org charts that all the board members look at!”
“Aw Shucks. Was worth a try though.”
“If this happens, you’ll be ‘Head of Equity Prop’ and that’s that. End of discussion.”
Stanley rose to leave.
“At least make it ‘Head of Equity Arbitrage and Prop’!” Nathan called after him down the aisle.
His junior trader began to chuckle.
“What?” asked Nathan, still looking after the blue suit that was disappearing behind a wall.
“Oh… nothing.” was all he got in reply.


The Chaos Army seems suspiciously well-organized.

RFMontraz
NP Italian Stallion

Total Posts: 1991
Joined: Mar 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-07 13:00
I was wondering what that meant myself, but too afraid to ask...

Fund Raising and Racketeering, Capital Structure Demolition LLC - What the fuck you mean "not interested" you motherfucker you??

Martingale
NP House Mouse

Total Posts: 2590
Joined: Jun 2004
 
Posted: 2005-04-07 13:55
Applause
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